Sound of my own wheels..........

title stolen from J. Browne & the eagles............
can't sleep again.....and it's hot....still.......not a breath of air outside or in.....well, that's not quite true as I have the a/c going in the bedroom
My oncologist is cheerleader perky. The day she told me that I had Hodgkins Lymphoma was like the happiest I'd ever seen her.....Of course, I only just met her that day so I really didn't have much to go on.......she asked me if I'd always marched to a different drummer, always done stuff just a little different than everyone else?......I just looked at her while Millyrose answered for me in the affirmative......then she told me that I had a very rare form of Hodgkins Lymphoma, one that less than four percent of lymphoma victims had......I don't think she said victim but that was her general drift.. she seemed thrilled about it......I told her that I was happy for her but that like Abe Lincoln, I could have passed on the honor......she's a great audience.....laughs at the slightest joke....'Course, I suspect that when someone is told they have cancer, their jokes would tend to be slight.....I prob'ly don't stand out from the herd there........
Anyway, I''ve been fighting diabetes for a long time.....I never tho't I'd actually win, y'understand, but I figured to come as close to a draw as I could. Now I seem to have a two-front war on my hands.....On the one hand....diabetes and on the other....cancer.......better not be anything else, I don't have any more hands....
Well, I'm yawning. I think I'll try sleeping again.......g'nite

Here I sit, all broken-hearted.......Nah!

That's a whole 'nother thing entirely. Fact is, I can't sleep. I think it must be the insulin. I've had insomnia ever since I started on the stuff. I'm tired and can't stop yawning but when I lie down in bed, the eyes pop open and I toss and turn 'til I get up. I'm bored with Solitaire.
I don't know if I'm stressing over my upcoming operation to clean out a carotid artery or the chemo that will follow it. I'm not sure I'm even stressing over it at all but something is keeping me awake. And I'm tired.
Still working on my tan by swimming an hour a day (George Hamilton, look out!).....
Son David scored a 95 on SSA test for the State. Pretty damn good. I don't think I could've come close to that. Come to think of it, all my children are out-performing me in almost every way and that's a good thing.

Random musings approaching 'the wall'..........

My eldest informed me that some of her friends were asking when I was going to write something interesting again....and she suggested that I do a blog......O well, I don't know how interesting this will be but wot the heck, if Rosie can do it, I can also....

So they tell me there's a wall that everybody hits when they reach a certain age.....I never really believed that but I didn't disbelieve it either....Gotta be truthful...never tho't about it....I think I just felt like age was just a number and a relatively meaningless one at that.....ANYWAY....it appears that I may have encountered that mystical wall.....HOO-AH! I would never use a term like that for real...that's something that they do in 3rd rate movies and 2nd rate teevee shows.....howsomever I was surprised to learn that I have lymphatic cancer.....not really frightened, mind you, but surprised and confused....I've heard that nothing quite focuses the mind as an intimate moment with your own mortality.......not true, at least for me....I've been magnificently confused and pretty much unable to get my coherent ducks in any sort of row..........
So this is me trying to get my ducks in a row......
O...and Justin Other Smith is a nom de plume that I tho't was really cool when I adopted it back in the halycon fifties......kind'a corny now but then, I s'poze, so'm I......David