Lazy old rainy old Satiday.....

One of the things that age teaches is that you shouldn't interfere with something that ain't bothering you....

Still raining...'n I slept in this morning..prob'ly cuz the dogs slept in also...I was in one of those somnambulistic states where you're not quite asleep but you ain't awake either...my eyes were closed 'n I was in the middle of a somewhat interesting dream...maybe taking a commercial break or something but certainly not ready to get up 'n miss the next part of the show when I felt Willie walking on me....I didn't bother to open my eyes, just kind'a pushed him away but he pushed back...I asked him if he didn't see that my eyes were closed 'n that he shouldn't bother me while I was asleep but he wouldn't have any part of that 'n persisted in his doggy endeavors until I finally opened my eyes 'n got up 'n stumbled to the door where I ascertained that it was another gloomy 'n rainy morning....Willie barely got off the porch before he was ready to come back inside but we were out there long enuff for me to figure out that it was much too late for me to go back to bed since it was 'tennish' or threabouts....ah well, coffee time...nuthin' of any real nooze in the SacBee....I mostly get my nooze off the computer these daze 'n it's almost always bad lately...talk about sensory overload...I'm not sure how many more major crises I can take....I saw somewhere that the Obama administration has begun referring to the Libya situation as a 'kinetic action'...at my advanced age, I figured out a long time ago that I wasn't the brightest bulb on the tree but my light still flickers a little bit 'n I know that kinetic means action so I was curious that Libya has become 'action action'....ah well, what the hell anyways....
Willie ran to the front window 'n began to huff 'n puff in that highly indignant manner he has whenever something or someone knew trespasses on our street...I glanced out to see the neighboring basset hound trotting down the middle of the street as tho' he owned it....Willie knows that the basset hound is a relative newcomer to our little part of the world but I figure that the basset hound prob'ly don't give a darn...dogs are funny that way, y'know....anyways, there are four dogs living 'crost the street from us now.....I don’t know them all that well but I know ‘em better’n I know the people who live with ‘em....two of the dogs lived with the previous tenants who were forced to move in search of employment...we hated to see ‘em go but that’s the nature of life during hard times....one of the dogs, seemingly the most fearless ‘n adventurous of the group, is a bassett hound...’n he’s a roamer...ordinarily, I don’t mind dogs that roam...when I first moved here, back in the halycon days of the late Twentieth Century, I let my own dogs roam at will...but times changed ‘n a leash law was passed forbidding dogs to wander... Now, Gawd knows that there is simply no way to explain the law to most people, let alone a dog...maybe that’s why we’re having so much trouble understanding Obamacare....Nancy Pelosi said we’d understand it once’t it was passed but it was passed ‘n I still don’t understand it...guess it’s just over my head.....

O Paddy dear, 'n did you hear.....

 
“Don’t drink ‘n drive, you might spill something.”

Well now, St. Paddy’s day is come ‘n gone with nary a taste of corned beef ‘n cabbage nor even a wee drop of green beer neither....t’was as sober as sober c’n be tho’ truth be told, I never in my life ever drank green beer....’n I even forgot to wear something green but it’s too late to pinch me for that wee faux pas...if anybody in the world still does that kind of thing....
We’re making up for it tho’ by repainting the kitchen ‘n dining room green....well, except for one wall which Millyrose has determined must be done in a shade of purple...t’is neither a dark green nor a dark purple, much softer ‘n somewhat reminiscent (I think) of a pleasant interlude in the wine country of northern California...now that I think on it however, a pleasant interliude in the wine country prob’ly wudn’t have cost much more...
Ah well, t’day (in the midst of a driving rainstorm) we went ‘out for lunch’...we took Mr. McPhail with us ‘n did lunch at Fabian’s...Fabian’s is an Italian Bistro, new to Fair Oaks, ‘n named after Fabian Forte that one-time contemporary of Frankie Avalon ‘n Frankie Valli ‘n Dick Clark’s American Bandstand....I’m not sure if the owners of Fabian’s is/are Fabian’s daughter ‘n son-in-law or (maybe) son ‘n daughter-in-law...whichever it wuz a pretty good place to lunch on a stormy afternoon ‘n I managed to get a little corned beef altho’ I don’t think there was any cabbage on the sandwich...I had coffee with my sandwich...not bad but when you get coffee in an Italian restaurant, they always serve it in those big W I D E cups...I’m told they do that becuz that’s the way they serve it in Italy...I’ve never been to Italy so I don’t if that’s so or not but in all the Italian movies I’ve ever seen, whenever anyone is drinking coffee, they’re always drinking espresso in those teeny, tiny little demi-tasse cups....I’m just sayin’.....

Life is good!.....

"We are born naked, wet and hungry. 
Then things get worse."

Up early on this rainy morning...durn roosters crowing, p’haps a little upset at the sun for taking its time t’day...well, shootfire (as we use’ta say back in the days of youthful innocence) this daylight savings time takes a little while to get accustomed to....still ‘n all, little dogs don’t pay much attention to clocks seeing as how they have an interior clock of their own that tells ‘em when to get up ‘n go outside to find that perfect spot to ‘do their bidness’....
It’s a nice quiet morning (well, except for the fact that I c’n hear rooster from one end of the street t’the other but that’s another story) ‘n I ain’t even looked at the nooze this morning...but I got coffee on the boil ‘n some left-over whipped-cream biscuits that’s practically guaranteed to boost my blood sugar....what the heck, biscuits to raise my sugar ‘n current events to raise my blood pressure...Life is good!

Like breathing out ‘n breathing in....

“Time’s fun when you’re having flies”....Kermit the Frog

Rainy evening in Ol Fair Oaks ‘n according to the teevee folks, gonna be off ‘n on rainy for the next week... what the heck, it’s Spring....I figure by the time it’s over, the weeds ‘n grasses ‘n such back there in the south forty’ll be high enuff to hide both my dogs ‘n most of the chickens that I suspect may be hiding out there....I think, well hope actually, that the skunks may have moved on...I give ‘em a wide berth whenever they come to visit...age don’t make a body any smarter but you don’t have to get too awful close to a skunk more’n once before you gain a little wisdom....don’t seem to work on dogs but my old granny use’ta say, “once burned, twice shy!”
I guess I’m gonna have to get my weed-whackers in shape but don’t see any great benefit in doing it too soon...I mean, the grass ‘n weeds ain’t gonna stop grow ing as long as it keeps on rainin’....

Disaster overload.....

There just ain't nuthin' humorous in current events....the nightmare in Japan...the civil war in Libya...the God-awful weather that has plagued the world this year....all these disasters make the p'litical situation in the USA seem almost petty....
A very religious friend of mine assured me that we are now in the 'End Times'....I told him that everyone in our age group was in our very own end times but he didn't respond to what I thought was at least marginally funny....
According to my friend, the Mayan calendar prophesies the end of the world altogether in 2012 but always looking out for that proverbial other hand, someone else pointed out that it was indeed the end of the Mayan calendar...evidently the Mayans thought that drawing up a calendar some 5000 years ahead was probably enough 'n that future Mayans 'ud be able to draw up another calendar...

old movies in the wee small......

Watching old movies in the middle of the nite is a really, really good way to guarantee a mind-numbing morning of coffee, more coffee ‘n a what in the heck was I thinking.....da boyz, of course, don’t really care one way or the other cuz dogs have an amazing ability to lie down ‘n go to sleep any time, any place...
‘n Willie has this uncanny sense of timing that tells him when I’m sleeping the soundest so that he may walk on top of me ‘n nose in my face until I wake up ‘n let him go outside to find the most favorable place in the whole durn yard to serve as his own personal bathroom...

Rainy day mem'ries 'n old dogs.....

One of my first mem'ries was living in a place called Shears Hollow with my parents...it was a one-room cabin 'n very isolated altho' I don't really remember the isolated part...my Dad worked nights 'n a friend of my Mom, a lady named Micki Hammond, loaned us her dog, a Belgian Shepard...he was a very protective dog 'n altho it hadn't been Micki's intent, she lost her dog to me...he was the first dog I ever had....
Rainy day Sundays....drip, drip, spatter, spatter.....all day long....well, ‘most all day long, a short pause in late morning then back attit....ah well, first I tink vell, den I tink hell, den I tink vell, wat de hell.....old joke ‘n originally done in a fake, very thick Swedish brogue....
Had a mobile groomer come by this morning ‘n bathe ‘n shear da boyz... I swear, poor Ol Rusty just looks embarrassed by it all...he was so matted ‘n his wool so thick ‘n now he’s down almost to bone...well, not quite but he’s sheared so close that he looks like a skinhead whippet...which wudn’t be so bad if’n he was a whippet but he’s a miniature poodle ‘n very put out by the whole thing....Willie on that proverbial other hand is carefree ‘n exceedingly nonchalant about the entire proceeding..
‘course, nuthin’ much ever fazes Willie....he just likes to eat, sleep ‘n chase....chickens, squirrels, cars, flying papers ‘n the occasional leaf....
When I was younger, the steady sound of falling rain (is there any other kind) was soothing ‘n the monotony would lull a body to sleep....now, the sound of the rain wakes me up ‘n sez, “Go to the bathroom, you old fart!”...as if I ackshully needed a reminder at my age...

Elitism for the masses......

Suede shoe intellectuals....’s a term I came up with back in my ‘way back when time....it was meant t’be hokey ‘n dismissive ‘n insulting....’n it was but not quite in the way that I had intended....
It was s’pozed t’be a play on psuedo intellectual but the people I had targeted didn’t view themselves as ‘psuedo’ anything ‘n cudn’t imagine that I had been talking about them...but, what was even funnier was that they believed that I had misunderstood the word ‘psuedo’ and simply didn’t know any better....which appears to be an endemic problem with the elitist class of suede shoe intellectuals ev’rywhere...
of course, away back then, I wuz a whole lot smarter than I am t’day ‘n knew so much more about everything....’n t’day, when I have come to recognize that I am severely limited in my reasoning ability, I find that my ignorance is so vast that it defies comprehension

Miscegenation....

It’s not that I got any personal problem with the inter-racial romance that appears t’be going on out in my south forty...I got over all that nonsense long ago...’n it ain’t that I begrudge the lonesome Pea Hen a little companionship to lighten her days...’n other than the fact that he picked my yard to hide out in, I don’t have anything personal ag’in the big ol’ white rooster with the black tail feathers...far’s I’m concerned, if they took up abode either up the street or down, I’d be okay with it...it’s like I tell my neighbors, one of the many reasons I like living in Ol Fair Oaks is that there ain’t a lot of arbitrary rules to live by...I mind my own bizness ‘n you mind yours...’long as you don’t dance on my toes, I don’t give a big rat’s ass who you dance with or what music you dance to...it’s your choice...just as long as you leave me alone with my choice....
Anyways, I was sleeping soundly, enjoying a dream when Willie came crawling over me ‘n began to nose at my face...I pushed him away but he wudn’t take ‘No’ for an answer so I struggled out’a bed ‘n staggered to the door...I had his leash on him but it didn’t seem to slow him down very much as he hit the blocks a-runnin’.....the Pea Hen ‘n the Rooster were sunning themselves (a guess since I don’t really know what they were doing) in the side yard... as Willie hit the end of the leash (23’) at a dead run ‘n yanked it from my sleepy hand...The Pea Hen gave out with a mighty blast of her air-horn ‘n took to the air...now she’s a lot bigger than any of the myriad chickens that call Ol Fair Oaks home but where they tend t’be a tad clumsy getting off the ground, pea fowl lift off like a graceful 727....she flew away across the parking lot, honking her mournful goodbyes ..(to the Rooster, I imagine)....or maybe, that ‘uz just her way of thumbing her nose at me ‘n Willie.....

When March comes in like a lion....

Watta day.....rain ‘n wind this mornin’....
darn rooster screaming ev’ry 8 seconds this morning ‘n then sumthin’ must’a really excited him cuz then he was crowing ev’ry 3 seconds....y’know, that seems like it’s barely enuff time for him to take a breath inbetween....so, I gave up ‘n got up.....
We’ve been adopted, it seems, by a large black ‘n white rooster....I figure he must’a got his butt kicked ‘n he’s just hiding out in our backyard....this morning, I looked out the window ‘n saw him flirting with the pea hen that’s been hanging out up the street...when she followed him into the back yard, I turned Willie ‘n Rusty out ‘n they ran her off... it’s not that I have a p’ticklar dislike for pea fowl but, miGawd!..they have a voice comparable to the air horn I have on my motorhome.....
People drop off all kind of fowl in Ol Fair Oaks...we have some of the most diverse chickens that a body c’d imagine ‘n somebody dropped off the pea hen last year....I kind’a feel sorry for her ‘n wish someone would drop off a Pea Cock to keep her comp’ny....but not at my house, please....up the street ‘ud be fine....got a lady up there that thinks it’s just fine for chickens to hang out in her back yard... or even her front yard, far’s I c’n tell...
She sounded a little amazed one day when she told me that a hen had followed her into her house ‘n then crapped in the floor....can’t imagine why she was surprised....

How doth the Bumble-Bee......

The amazing Charlie Sheen...not only upstaged the Oscars but took headlines in the Daily Snooze away from the turmoil in the mid-East ‘n the union agitators in Wisconsin...whether you are amused by his antics or appalled by his amoral lifestyle, there’s no denying that his Bad Boy persona has engaged the attention of a large part of the world like no other actor since....well, maybe John Wilkes Booth whose infamy might have been greater if the world had been able to tweet about it...
One of the most interesting aspects, of course, is that everyone has the ability to judge Charlie ‘n there ain’t a damn thing he c’n do about it....except maybe, revel in it...and ev’ryone seems t’be fascinated by a train wreck...I once saw a train wreck where one train ran smack-dab into a parked train ....it was kind’a like watching it in slow motion as they collided and the boxcars rose in the air to hang seemingly motionless for a moment before crashing to the ground...
it was as if time took a breather for a fraction of a second ‘n all the people around me seemed frozen as we all stared....
Anyways, for all our judgments or in spite of them, none of us can predict with certainty how Charlie’s train wreck will eventually end but it will end ‘n there will be damage and the world will move on....
‘n on a post-script side: How does the Muslim world choose someone to cast the first stone?