Therapeutic rant......

“Nothing impedes therapy like acute intermittent flatulence.”

I don’t know where I heard that but I’m not gonna take credit for saying it....I’ll just pass it along for what it’s worth...
I wish I c’d explain that to my dogs...maybe they need more exercise or less food or maybe I shouldn’t feed them scraps of toast or whatever altho’ I really don’t think it’s the ‘people’ food they get....it might be the food they steal or whatever it is that they find outside ‘n Gawd alone knows what that c’d be.....but when you’re having a quiet evening in front of the telly ‘n the dogs are asleep and a fetid odor comes drifting......well, even if y’don’t get the drift, I did....
ANYWAYS.....t’is three in the A.M. again ‘n I find m’self sitting in front of the computer ‘stead of pounding my ear...
It’s a quiet nite.....no sirens, no traffic noise, no bloody chickens cackling altho’ I’m sure all those things are subject to change....s’funny how those darn chickens set up such a fuss whenever anything moves on this little street but the creepers who come in the nite to rifle what unlocked vehicles they find here don’t seem to disturb them.....evidently neither do the wannabe gangsta taggers that come thru here periodically with their ubiquitous spray cans of paint...y’d think that in artsy Ol Fair Oaks we’d at least have taggers with talent but no such luck...all we get are no-talent hacks that don’t know how to spell....well, those ‘n whoever it is that keeps pulling up the same stop sign in the middle of the Village....wonder why the County doesn’t replace it with one made out of metal ‘n set in stone....cost more in the beginning, I’m sure, but since it gets taken down so often, it should be amortized fairly quickly....on that proverbial other hand, replacing the stop sign does seem to provide steady employment for someone.....’n y’know, if the County wanted to help in this recession by putting people to work, they c’d sell off those gargantuan garbage trucks that rumble about the highways ‘n byways of our fair land ‘n replace ‘em with smaller, quieter, cheaper trucks, staff ‘em like they used to with a driver ‘n two pickup men....why, they used to come into your yard to pick up your garbage ‘n they did it for, as I recall, about two or three dollars a week......’n that wasn’t in my ‘way back when’ days cause they didn’t even have garbage service back then.....we just tossed our leftovers into the back of the cave....simple folk we were.....
‘Course, I was back in the hills of Kentucky a few years ago ‘n lots of people had their own private dumps...I never tho’t much of it when I was a kid, but those are really bad things t’day....when I heard that the present Governor of Kentucky wanted to provide garbage pickup for every resident of the State, I tho’t that was a good idea (even tho’ basically I’m ag’in guv’mint interference).....
I think cleaning up our planet is a good thing ‘n I think we should put Martha in charge....she’d have to be better at it than any politician cuz I don’t trust politicians....Heck! I don’t know anyone with an IQ over forty that’d trust a politician as much as a car salesman ‘n that’s my last word for t’day......s