"If it ain't worth cheating, lying or stealing to get, it ain't worth having!"  Fat Ollie

Fat Ollie wuz a one-time acquaintance of mine…I'm hesitant to call him a buddy 'cuz that'ud be sort'a like keeping a rattlesnake for a pocket pet…t'ain't healthy!

He wuz a charmer of sorts, howsumever, kind'a like a politician or a used car salesman with a practiced crocodile grin 'n a ready line of talking points…at least as long as they're allowed to use a teleprompter 'n make up their own facts as they go…'n yeah, for all the liberals who might not recognize it, that's called sarcasm: the use of irony to mock or convey contempt. 

The Sacramento Bee claims that a large majority of Californians support Obamacare…'n I s'poze that's t'be expected in a state where non-taxpaying residents outnumber the taxpayers…our politicians tell us that the Federal government has all this 'free' money 'n will use it to bail us out becuz they think we're too big to be allowed to fail…of course, if the Republicans win the WH 'n the Senate, that may not come to pass…I expect the taxpaying citizens of all those other states might not want to pay for California excesses…sort'a like the city of Stockton…

I recall when I wuz a boy, that a bunch of us got together 'n built a cabin up near the head of Schoolhouse Hollow…we didn't see the need for a foundation so we didn't use one…'n we didn't need windows 'cuz you could see out between the unchinked openings 'n likewise we didn't see the need to have more roof than we tho't necessary so we just piled enuff branches on top to block the sun…and that night, out first night in our new cabin, it come a downpour….might as well not had a roof over our heads at all 'n since we basically built in a creaked, we sure had running water 'n since it wuz blacker'n coaltar that night, it wuz fortunate for us that there wuz  enuff lightening for us to stumble down the hollow 'n go home…good thing for us that we had a safety net…('n for the liberals, that's also sarcasm)

Safety nets are good things for children…it's good for children to try new things 'n it's good for them to face up to failure, especially when they have parents to bail them out…

So, I guess Stockton c'n look to Jerry 'n the boys to bail 'em out with maybe just a 'small' tax on the rest of us to pay for their lack of a foundation in their beautiful waterfront downtown….(again: sarcasm) My mother use'ta say that cheaters never win but...

Fat Ollie also said, "He who dies with the most toys, wins."

Dead skunk in the middle of the road...

"Take a whiff on me, that ain't no rose!

Roll up your window 'n hold your nose

You don't have to look 'n you don't have to see

'Cause you can feel it in your olfactory…"

Loudon Wainwright

Skunks are fearless critters…they pretty much wander at will 'n  'most other critters give 'em a wide berth as much as possible…seems like nobody wants to argue right of way with a skunk…'cept people in automobiles, I guess…

Now Mama Skunk has been leading her brood out 'n about the village for weeks now…the baby skunks are getting up there in size tho' not as big as Mama yet…guess they must be teenage skunks…anyway, one of 'em ain't gonna get any bigger 'cuz he (or she, I dunno 'n ain't gonna find out) done got flattened while crossing Fair Oaks Boulevard down by the water company…'n I can't think of a business where a dead skunk in the middle of the road makes a plainer statement than Fair Oaks Water…

Now I've heard that a skunk'll make a nice pet 'n if you got one, I guess I'll take your word for it…got a fellow visits the Avenue periodically claims he's had several 'n he's never had one that had the scent gland removed…I told him he wuz probably braver than Gunga Din but he didn't know who Gunga Din wuz 'n I didn't feel like explaining Kipling to a man that had kept several skunks as pets…I asked him if his skunks had ever got upset 'n sprayed near him 'n he said as how they had but it didn't really bother him none…I couldn't think of anything to say about that so I changed the subject of the conversation to fishing…turns out he wuz something of an avid fisherman also which I ain't so I just nodded at what I tho't wuz appropriate times until I tho't I heard Millyrose calling me…

Sometimes, it's good to have extraordinary hearing...

"Live fast, play hard, die young 'n leave a beautiful memory…"  Faron Young

Errol Flynn wuz a certifiable icon back in the day…there wuz a popular phrase, "In like Flynn" that typified his status as a role model…now, of course, it's politically incorrect to hold a boozing, brawling, womanizer up as a model for young men but that's a problem for this generation 'n not mine…

This generation is told over 'n over that they must plan for their future else they'll be destitute in their old age 'n become a burden on the government…many of the young men of my generation followed the Errol Flynn plan for old age retirement…live as hard 'n fast as you can 'n you won't have to worry about old age 'cuz you'll be dead 'n nothing to worry about then…the big problem is, many of us that practiced that p'ticklar plan are surprised that we're still alive…I don't know what went wrong 'cuz it seemed t'me that we all tried really hard but, unlike Flynn who had the good sense to die at 50 years old, most of us are still here...

So, t'other day my good friend, GSam Piatt, reminisced about swimming the Ohio River as a boy…I wuz 14, I think, tho' maybe 13, when I finally got 'guts up' 'n swam the mighty Ohio…I did it alone which wuzn't my best idea ever but I got it done tho' I wuz, as they use'ta say 'worn to a frazzle' when I got to the other side….I rested for a long time before walking upriver to find a good place to begin my swim back…I walked all the way to the U.S. Grant Bridge 'n then I sat down 'n stared out across the river 'n made my mind up to forget about it 'n walk home…I didn't have a nickel for the toll but after a little teasing, the toll-taker let me pass 'n I trudged barefoot across that long, long bridge…

When I got to the Kentucky side, I cudn't face the walk down the road so I went down to the river, found m'self a bit of driftwood 'n floated downstream to Beattyville Landing…

I never, ever swam that old river again but I knew that I could if I wuz pressed 'n that wuz good enuff…'course, Hobo Cooper could swim back 'n forth across that river probably about as easily as I swim laps in the pool today…

"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty 'n gradually approach eighteen."  Mark Twain

Mondaze.....

Here t'is Monday already, summers just begun 'n seems t'be flying by 'n don't seem  t'be at all bothered whether anybodys having fun or not...

About a week ago the 'squatters' across the street packed up 'n moved out…the pick'emup trucks ran steady for a couple daze….'n then, a few daze later, they came back with two trucks 'n scavenged the house….y'know, stuff like the a/c, fixtures, etc…

After them, different scavengers came 'n went, carrying off cans 'n bottles 'n assorted 'other stuff 'til there ain't much left 'cept plain old trash...

And t'day…well, this morning ackshully, a red Nissan pick'emup truck (one of the original(?) squatters) returned with a truckload of trash which he deposited on the property 'n drove away…gives a whole new meaning to the word 'audacity'….

Otherwise, the village wuz on the quiet side this morning when da boyz 'n I took our little stroll…we had a nice conversation with an old boy from Sandy Hook who gets a little homesick now 'n again but his wife is from this area 'n he's determined to make the best of things...'n Willie bit a bee…he wuz somewhat nonplussed at that…I do believe it wuz the very first time that he's ever managed to chomp down on one…if he wuz a truly smart doggie, it'ud probably be the last time but I don't hold our a lot of hope for that…'course, I don't really talk politics with Willie…at least, not very often as it's my belief that dogs are just natural Democrats 'n my quarreling with 'em 'ud probably give them dyspepsia or somthing 'n the end result would be another vet bill for me...life ain't easy after you turn into a Republican...

Sunday in the park....

Y'know, I still carry a pocketknife with me just like I did in those once't upon a time daze in Beattyville…I ain't gone barefootin' in years howsumever…seems like rocks are rockier on old feet, sandals are 'bout near as I come to barefoot t'day…I got to thinking about what I use'ta tote around in my pockets back then…a pocket knife, some fishing line, hook 'n sinker, maybe a couple small stones 'cept we didn't call 'em stones, we called 'em rocks…

what I didn't carry with me in those long-ago daze wuz plastic baggies for picking up dog poop…I betcha that the entire population of the United States back then would'a looked askance at anybody that went around picking up dog poop…'course, it's pretty common t'day 'n people look askance at anyone who duzn't pick up after their dog…well, here in California anyways…I'm sure that there are still a lot of places in this country where they don't have leash laws 'n people don't go around picking up dog poop!

Ah well, one of the things that you need t'do if you're gonna think of yourself as civilized, is to be mindful 'n show a little consideration for your fellow human beings…I mean, let's face it, if you're out for a Sunday stroll 'n you step in dog poop, it might not ruin your whole day but it'll certain for sure put an exclamation mark next to a few minutes of it…

So, for some reason 'n I blame it on old-timers, not altzheimers, I left the house t'day without putting in a roll of those little green baggies  that we bought for the express purpose of picking up dog poop, quoting the Preezy, "It's the right thing to do!"….

Anyway, halfway thru our little stroll, I realized that I didn't have the baggies in my pocket (don'cha just love cargo pants with all them pockets)…I mean, I had my knife 'n my cellphone 'n my keys 'n my handkerchief 'n my wallet…I even had a small stone that I picked up along the way but I didn't have those little green baggies that we bought for the express purpose of picking up dog poop!

'N I began to fear that right out there in the middle of the park in front of all those turistas, one or both of my dogs might decide that wuz the opportune time to take a dump 'n I wudn't be able to pick it up 'n deposit it in the trash cans so thoughtfully provided by the Fair Oaks Park 'n Recreation District so I turned right around 'n made my way back to Crestline lickety-split…or as lickety-split as a body can when he is encumbered by two small dogs that didn't particularly want to go back so soon…

But we did…'n we barely made it back to Crestline when both of 'em decided that they had waited long enuff so they crapped in the dry leaves across the street from Nabor Doug 'n I didn't have to pick up the dog poop in the little green baggies that we bought for the express purpose of picking up dog poop but that I had forgot 'n left at home….

And that's the truth!

Justin Other Friday…

'n not much else, if it'ud been just a l'il bit cooler I might'a put on a pair of long pants…ain't very often this time of year that we get clouds 'n even a dozen or so raindrops tho' not enuff to use the wipers…still, it's been very pleasant 'n s'pozed to be that way clean thru the coming weekend…

"It is better to take what does not belong to you than to let lie around neglected."  Mark Twain

So, I sat on the porch 'n watched the scavengers work across the street…I think they maybe got close to 20 bucks or so worth of cans 'n bottles 'n more power to 'em…the squatters that last occupied the place didn't leave much but junk 'n trash…one of my neighbors has already contacted the county about coming out 'n cleaning the place up…seems that if the county is coping with foreclosed properties that come under the aegis of Freddie Mac 'n Fannie Mae (us taxpayers) they don't dawdle about cleaning them up as Freddie 'n Fannie pay up without questions…

It wuz a pleasant evening 'n I wuz chatting with brother John when Willie became agitated…it don't take a lot for him so I didn't pay any attention at first, Heck, it might'a been a cat, a squirrel, an errant leaf….but it wudn't any of those, what it wuz, wuz a parade of skunks…

See, up the street at the California House live a family of skunks…that is, a Mama skunk 'n four baby skunks 'n they were out for their evening stroll is all….I heard from Nabor Doug how they come out about the same time every evening, just Mama Skunk showing her children around the old neighborhood…they are quite a striking lot, if I do say so m'self 'n fortunately didn't seem inclined to linger at my place which didn't hurt my feelings none at all…not that I hold any personal animosity towards them being a proponent of the live 'n let live philosophy, it's just that Willie is inclined t'be a little obstreperous at times when he's meeting someone or something new 'n I wudn't want them t'get the wrong impression 'n maybe get upset with us…

Anyway, all's well that ends well 'n when last seen, the Family Skunk wuz exploring another property…maybe they'll take up residence where the squatters left 'n the county will deal with them…I believe I'd invite some guests to sit on my front porch 'n observe that…county workers really earring their money then...

The rooster of Ol Fair Oaks are demanding that the sun rise 'n start the day...

4:30 in the A.M. 'n no sleep for the wicked altho' I don't believe that I qualify as 'wicked'…since that word means evil, sinful, immoral, wrong 'n a whole host of really bad things including nasty, harsh 'n unpleasant…Elwood P. Dowd said, 'n I paraphrase: "There are two ways of getting along in this old world; one is to be oh so very clever 'n the other is to be pleasant. I recommend pleasant."  

I tho't that wuz good advice 'n since I never had the capacity t'be clever, I have tried to stick with pleasant since I'm basically a lazy person 'n pleasant seemed a good alternative to working hard…I think that's not a particularly original thought on my part as a lot of lazy people seem to be on the pleasant side…that's not to say that those people who are hard-working 'n industrious can't be pleasant when they can find the time, it's just that they seem t'be so very, very busy…

Take Nabor Doug, f'rinstance…he's ackshully a very pleasant fellow, most generally has a big smile on his face as he goes hurrying by…he goes for a walk every day, sometimes twice a day, as do I but the similarity begins 'n ends with the word 'walk'…See, we have totally different definitions of the word 'walk'…he goes head down, arms pumping, full speed ahead while I tend to amble…'course, he does go alone while I muddle along with da boyz 'n dogs, as you probably know, are natural amblers…'n generally pleasant tho' Rusty talks a lot 'n Willie is always ready for an adventuresome chase should the opportunity present itself…

Down the hill is Signor Paulo who could have stepped out of an early Steinbeck novel…Paulo walks every day also, not like Nabor Doug who walks with purpose aforethought 'n Paulo don't amble like me…he's more of a stroller, a man with a casual attitude…he ain't really Italian, it's that he leads what use's be thought of as an Italinate lifestyle…y'know, a glass of wine, a cigarette 'n always  time to stop for a little conversation…I expect that overall, Signor Paulo is more pleasant that m'self because he's younger…when I became a septuagenarian, I also became a little impatient with the movers 'n shakers that intrude upon my little world…y'know the ones of which I speak…the people that want to take pizza 'n soda pop out of my diet, those people that believe sidewalks 'n streetlights will improve the quality of my life, the people that want me to get rid of my old truck 'n ride a bicycle the way I did when I wuz twelve years old…

Problem is, I ain't twelve years old 'n I like pizza 'n soda pop 'n I never did give a tinkers dam for sidewalks 'n streetlights 'n I have an old truck just because…(when my mother got tired of coming up with reasons to satisfy the curiosity of young boys, she'd say 'Just because!")…

"A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval."  Mark Twain 

And it's only Tuesday....

"It usually takes me more than 3 weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech."  Mark Twain

Y'know, t'day our hip-hop Preezy gave a speech down in Mexico…he spoke for 30 or 35 minutes without a teleprompter giving the lie to his critics who say he is dependent on the written word…of course, he didn't say anything in all that time which is kind'a remarkable when you think that if you give a monkey a paintbrush 'n some paint 'n a blank canvas 'n enuff time, he c'd probably turn out something that could pass for a work of art…but, I digress…but then, so does the skeezy-preezy when he doesn't have a teleprompter…

And Kevin Johnson, the once upon a time round-baller 'n current Mayor of Sack-o-tomato, endorsed the bullet train because, as every good Democrat knows, our government must rebuild the infrastructure of the whole country to keep us competitive with all those other countries that are so much ahead of us…oh yeah, 'n get our unemployment under control…it don't really matter that government spending is essentially robbing Peter to pay Paul with the house taking a percentage of every hand…what here in Sacramento, we ignorant conservatives call Maloof-enomics…

Lessee, our all-knowing government wants to tax the wealthy to build a high-speed rail system that only the wealthy can afford to ride and the under-lying intent is simply to provide jobs for the middle class…Gosh! I wonder how many ticket-takers 'n porters 'n assorted wait-persons it'll take to staff this wonderful highspeed rail system that promises to save the California electorate…'n again, quoting from Mark Twain, "The public is the only critic whose opinion is worth anything at all."

A warmish Sunday morn...

"The more things are forbidden, seems like the more people want'a do 'em."  

Walking in the park on a warm Sunday morning with da boyz…little dogs onleash become protective 'n aggressive toward other dogs 'n my boyz ain't any different…problem is, seems like large dog owners think that it's perfectly fine to walk their dogs sans leash…just one of those entitlement issues so prevalent t'day…I don't want anyone to misunderstand ~ I like dogs, big ones, small ones 'n those in-between…'n I've had dogs all my life…well, since I wuz a toddler 'n that wuz a long, long time ago…We lived in a one-room cabin in Scherers Hollow…it wuz kind'a isolated there my mother's friend, Micki Hammonds, gave us her  Belgian Shepard for company 'n protection cuz my dad worked swing shift…He wuz just the first of many dogs that have lived with me 'n all my dogs ran free for most of my life…

But, times change 'n humanity flourishes 'n so do dogs 'n there's just a whole lot of both 'n a lot of cars as well 'n it just ain't in the public interest (or doggie interest either) to allow dogs the unfettered access to the world at large that they use'ta  enjoy…I mean, there's a reason for leash laws same as there is a reason for traffic laws…So, to all those free-spirited dogwalkers that think they're doing their pets a favor by allowing them to run leashfree, I have a great big nooze flash:  You ain't doing them or your neighbors any favor 'n the only thing you're proving is that your sense of entitlement that the rules somehow don't apply to you means that you are a blithering idiot…oh 'n fyi, blithering is just a nicer way of parsing what people really say about you….

"Such is the human race 'n sumtimes it seems a pity that brother Noah didn't miss the boat."

Kickin' down the cobblestones...

"Slow down, you move too fast, you got to make the mornin' last….." Paul Simon

Well, here t'is Friday again…seems like it rolls around ever' week 'bout this same time

'n it's warmish here in Ol Fair Oaks…to be perfectly honest, it's that time of year when we're gonna see those triple-digit daze 'n our luv'ly Delta breeze is gonna stay away 'n warmish is despite all our hopes 'n wishes, gonna turn into hottish…NOT quite Red Bluff hottish 'n nowhere close to Death Valley hottish but f'durn sure central valley hottish…

which, in essence, means that common-sensically, you gotta get up early if you want t'do much of anything…'course, that also explains why Siesta is a popular California pastime, 'specially among those of us old enuff to believe in the 80/40 rule (if it's over 80o 'n you're over 40, don't do the mad dog 'n Englishman thing, stay out of the noonday sun)…

"Water, taken in moderation, can't hurt anybody."  Mark Twain

"....and the day wore on." Elwood P. Dowd

If you begin your day all tangle-footed, it's a good idea to ask for a do-over….'course, you ain't gonna get one 'cause life just don't work that way…

Looks like the squatters across the street have done picked up 'n moved on…'n on a good note, it appears that they took all their dogs with 'em…I wuz just the slightest bit worried that they were gonna go off 'n leave 'em…I don't know how many people were living in that little house 'n since I wuz in 'n out all day m'self, I kind'a lost track of exactly how many mattresses they moved out of there but it seemed like ev'er time I saw 'em load one of their many pick'em up trucks, they had several mattresses strapped on top of whatever else…

Ackshully, I wuz glad to see 'em go…'specially since they quit mowing the grass 'n picking up the fast food wrappers…'n even more 'specially after I found out that I'm missing the license stickers from my mtrhome 'n my truck…I don't know how much that's gonna cost me but I'm pretty sure that the State of California will figure it's my own durn fault for putting temptation in the way of the obviously needy squatters…I think that's basically a Democrat thing, blaming the victim…remember the "Don't help a good kid go bad by leaving your keys in your car." …as if a 'good' kid would steal your car in the first place…I think the liberal mindset is that everyone is basically dishonest at heart 'n only government support will keep the entire populace on the straight 'n narrow….

Anywaze…the Farmers Market has come to Ol Fair Oaks…gonna be in Plaza Park every Wednesday from 3:00 to 8:00…'n if you like Fair Oakish, you'll like our new Farmers Market…

'N lest I forget, Millyrose passed her drivers license test with flying colors as if there might have been any doubt…still, dealing with the California Department of Motor Vehicles is the real test…I heard the Governor of Indiana say that his DMV took an average of 20 minutes…the Carmichael DMV only took an hour 'n ten minutes 'n that wuz with an appointment…Gawd alone knows how long it'ud take for a walk-in….

Daze of summer....

So, the sun is shining 'n the temp is going up, up, 'n away….there ain't no breeze a'tall a'tall, least as far as I c'n tell…'n there ain't no SacBee either…well, we went for a long time without missing a paper or even having to look for it as it wuz purty much in the same place ever' morning…then the guy retired or found a real job or moved because we've evidently had a couple different carriers the last few months 'n they're iffy about the snooze-nooze…plus they tend to drop it in different places in some kind of hide'n seek game…'n if I still can't find it, why then I have to 'make contact' with the old Bee answering system (press 1, press 2, press 3, etc) so that sometime later in the morning, a real live person'll come by, drop a paper by the door 'n disappear…I could maybe understand it better if this wuz our winter season when it's dark 'n wet 'n cold 'n sane people don't even want to think about getting out of a nice warm bed to go do a job that used to be a foot in the door to economic security for the budding entrepreneurs of yesterday…Although I never ackshully participated in such an endeavor m'self, two of my brothers did though neither of them came anywhere close to Warren Buffett status…'course, they did manage to acquire new bicycles out of it (one of which wuz unfortunately destroyed by a customer backing over it with her own vehicle which wuz much larger 'n had 4 wheels 'n a teeny-tiny rearview mirror)…

Ah well, daze of yore...

Morning stroll....

Bizzy time in Ol Fair Oaks this morning….clusters of young men in orange vests directing traffic (this time o' day about one car ever' 5 mins or so)…big orange signs blockading the Village center so that people'll know that someone, somewhere, is doing something (or about t'do something)…

What it is, I think, is the Beautification Effort that the movers 'n shakers have come up with (at a cost of more than a quarter-million dollars) to install replica old-tyme lights to spruce up the Village center…I'm okay with the replica lights tho' I don't think we'll get more turistas oohing 'n aahing over 'em 'n I b'leeve they prob'ly could'a gone to Home Depot 'n got 'em cheaper but opinions are like..well, y'know….

And the big nooze is that we got a 'Farmers Market' coming to Plaza Park…s'pozed to be every Wednesday (I think)…I'll have to skip walking da boyz around the park on those daze   cuz they definitely don't play well with others 'n that's probably my fault 'cause I never ever take 'em to the dog park to play with other doggies….

And the Primary Election in California was what my Grandma Smith would'a called a 'hum-dinger'….we got people that nobody ever heard of running for offices that most people don't know existed 'n to generate more income for ad agencies, the top two contenders have to go at it again…Someone famous once said that people get the government they deserve but Mark Twain said, "If you swing a cat by the tail, you learn things that you can't learn any other way."

A stroll in a Spring rain...

Just a-walkin' in the rain….which is sumthin a body don't often do here in Ol Fair Oaks, well, if it c'n be avoided, that is…generally, when it rains here, it's cold 'n unpleasant but today…well, today is a little different…it's been warmish hereabouts, nudging those triple digits 'n last nite we had ourselves a Delta breeze 'n about a 20o drop in the temperature 'n t'day, we got ourselves some rain…well, some drizzle anyways…more than virga 'n less than actual rain…back in the USA (Kentucky) summer rains were always warm 'n walking in the rain wuz quite often a pleasant diversion..

Speaking of diversions, the big tee-vee event lately wuz the Costner mini-series on the Hatfield 'n McCoy feud…it wuz a  relatively timely thing since the feud took place only a little over a hundred years ago…

Still, people are talking about it all over again…one of my daughters asked me (since I'm fond of saying that you can't kick over a stone in eastern Ky without turning up some kinfolk) which side of the feud were we on anyway…'n I had to confess that as far as I know, we're not any blood kin to either one of those tragic families…

Now, is there any connection?  Probably, since it's a relatively small area 'n I have a lot of cousins who have a lot of cousins who have a lot of cousins so there very probably 'n highly likely that almost everyone with roots in the Kentucky hill country has some connection with either one or both of those famous feuding families…

That said, I enjoyed the series…there wuz a lot of fine actors involved 'n going by my own reading on the subject, they seemed to have done their homework…well, as far as Hollywood seems capable of at any rate…they do seem overly fond of stereotyping down there in those Hollywood hills 'n I'd guess that a number of  those screenwriters still believe that the stereotypes of yesterday still fit today…Well, given the level of education in our modern society, I guess a certain degree of ignorance is to be expected…anyway, I wuz reminded of this because some of the Kentuckians of my acquaintance were offended by the portrayal of 'hillbillies' as ignorant, slovenly, drunken. gun-toting louts capable of the most casual murders with or without provocation….it's no wonder that Americans of Italian descent are offended by the Hollywood view that Italians are either violent mafiosi types or comic-opera buffoons…

Of course, Hollywood seems to exist on an equal opportunistic scale of bigotry as they have found cubbyholes for every segment of society, no matter the color, creed, or ethnicity including all the spinoffs that humanity has been able to come  up with…

So when someone asks me if the Hatfields 'n the McCoys are still at odds with each other, I resist the temptation to rant about the bigotry 'n racism that never seems to go away 'n I just tell 'em the truth as I know it…"If you find yourself in the vicinity of the Tug River Valley 'n you see a gun-toting hillbilly comin' at you, turn around 'n run as fast as you can for the safety of one of our American city streets (sarcasm for the unenlightened)…. 

"Y'know, a bigot is just a mule-headed idiot who is attached to an opinion you don't agree with"...

Justin Other Smith

A buck in the south forty.....

"Be obscure clearly."  E.B. White

Well, it looks as if we might get a cool spell, maybe even a little rain…it happens now 'n then tho' it's often more trouble than it's worth…what it does is, it causes the grasses to grow 'n then it gets hot again 'n dries everything out 'n creates a fire hazard…'n that, as Baretta use'ta say is the name of that tune…

Anywaze, it's been warmish (not quite triple digits but close) 'n a young buck has taken refuge in our south forty (if you ain't figured it out yet, that's what I call my overgrown back yard)…most years we get two bucks 'n a doe 'n last year we had a doe 'n her fawn (deer get very protective with their young)…when they're around, I keep a close watch on da boyz…Rusty (the old poodle-dogger) might show a little curiosity but wudn't push the issue but Willie is a whole 'nother story…last year, with the doe 'n her fawn, I had to keep Willie on a short leash…I believe he tho't they were just large dogs 'n he wanted to play… the other day, he met up with a big old black rooster who not only didn't run from him but went into attack mode…fortunately for Willie, I take a dim view of roosters when I'm in a good mood so I didn't kick the bird as hard as I might otherwise have done…

The Chicken Whisperer (the self-appointed shepherd of our flock of feral fowl) told me that chicken rustlers were coming to town 'n making off with roosters in wholesale numbers…

"Nobody eats roosters" she declared.  "They're taking them to the cockfights to be killed."

"You're probably right," I replied, "it's a tough life being a chicken."

On the whole, I quite like The Chicken Whisperer but I've learned that we definitely do not have a shared sense of humor so I keep most of my snide comments to myself or maybe share 'em with Nabor Doug who is of a similar mind to myself…

I read somewhere that behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes…Boy, I wish't that wuz true!

Justin Other summer Sunday.....

There are people who are blessed with good sense…everybody knows 'em, they're the ones who listen 'n learn…they generally play well with others 'n their teachers always tell their parents that they're a joy to have in their classrooms…'n then, there's the rest of us…we're the ones who get frustrated 'cuz the square peg don't want to fit in the round hole so we take a hammer to it…we only read the directions after all other attempts have failed 'n we never, never ask for directions until we can't do anything else 'n then we get mad about it…we're the ones who are really mad at John Edwards for being the kind shitheel we always knew he was but didn't want to admit that we knew it all the time 'n if we could. we'd tar 'n feather him 'n ride him out of town on a rail…well, that's what we use'ta do anyways back in 'them good old daze'…

'course, that could be one of our problems…the way we recall the good old days, back when we were young 'n everything was perfect…d'ya remember those daze? Those lazy, hazy, crazy daze of summer, those daze of hot dogs 'n….ah well, mem'ries are a funny thing…all of us remember our past the way we want to whether it actually happened that way or not 'n I suppose that's a good thing…if we were to dwell on the way things actually happened, we'd probably all have ulcers 'n worse 'n we'd read the obits with a sense of joy rather than sadness…I sometimes tell people that when I wake up in the mornings, I check my pulse to make sure it's still beating before I get out of bed 'n then when I look at the news, I check the obits to make sure that I'm not there…

When I was young, I never thought I'd ever fall into the trap of doing the same thing at the same time every day…I hated going to work because every boss I ever had wanted me to be there at the same time every day 'n do the same old boring thing every day 'n that just wasn't me 'n I wasn't going to have any part of living MY LIFE that'away…Right!  Now, I like my routine 'n if I'm forced to deviate in some minor way, I get irritated about it…I like to sleep in 'til I'm ready to get up…I like my coffee the way I like it 'n when I read the news on the computer, I check my old hometown newspaper first 'n it's the obits that I read…just making sure, I guess, that I'm not there…

Of course, I have a little help with my daily routine…da boyz (dogs that they are) love their morning walk 'n if I'm a little late getting started, they complain 'n they beg 'n they use guilt ever' bit as good as my Mother in law 'n she was an expert…

Anyway, it's durn near a perfect summer day here in Ol Fair Oaks 'n while da boyz have been out already, they want'a go again…

Playing in traffic....

So I'm drivin' down Sunrise which if you don't know is a major arterial mover of automocar traffic out here in the north area…

well, six lanes anyway north 'n south with mostly a 50 mph speed limit…'n I'm thinking the primary function of driving in this traffic is the art of avoidance…y'try really hard to avoid hitting any other vehicles 'n you try just as hard to avoid getting hit by any other vehicles…the trick is to come as close as you can without actually scraping paint…sort of like a real-life video game except with consequences…

Mostly, I try to avoid actually driving on Sunrise, not counting crossing Sunrise on other streets, of course, 'cause basically if I'm gonna go almost anywhere at all, I have to cross Sunrise or drive on Sunrise…But, I never, ever walk on Sunrise…I do, on occasion, come close enough to view Sunrise…well, at least a little patch of it, that part of it down the hill from the manor house…'n it's hard not to look when you hear the sirens 'n tires screeching but some of that you c'n just write off to entertainment…

Once upon a time, many years ago, Millyrose 'n I spent a night or two in a cabin on the bank of the Snake River in Wyoming…it wuz Springtime in the Tetons (I think that's the name of that p'ticklar mountain range) 'n the river wuz running high 'n fast with a steady roar that sounded just like Sunrise except without the sirens….just shows t'go you that wherever you go, there you are…

It's warmish here t'day, temp approaching triple digits…I got 3 of our a/c's running, not that you'd take particular notice of them if you were here unless, of course, you stepped outside…I'm gonna wait until the evening shade before I take da boy on their evening amble…it'll still be hot then but I'm thinking it might be a little cooler on their feet…not that they've complained about it, they're pretty good about no complaining s'long as they get to go a couple times a day…

I don't know why work is considered to be a virtue 'n laziness a sin because life is short 'n work is hard!